Let’s be real, wedding planning can feel like walking a fine line between trying to be the chill bride/groom/partner and advocating for what you actually want. And somewhere in between cake tastings and floral mock-ups, many couples start holding back on giving real feedback to their vendors. Why? Because it feels awkward. You don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. You assume they know best. You worry you’re being “too much.”
But here’s the truth: giving honest feedback is one of the most helpful things you can do to set your vendors (and your wedding day) up for success.
Your vendors aren’t mind-readers. They’re creative professionals who actually want your input. When you hold back, you’re not being easygoing, you’re just delaying the fix until it’s too late to change it.
So, let’s talk about how to give feedback that’s clear, kind, and productive… even when it feels uncomfortable.
Start With Trust, Then Be Honest
The best vendor relationships are built on mutual respect. If you picked someone for their work and reputation, trust that they can handle constructive feedback. Whether it’s your florist, DJ, planner, or photographer, they’ve worked with all kinds of couples and you’re not the first person to ask for a tweak.
Example:
At my makeup trial, I felt like my foundation was too heavy and didn’t match my undertone. I nervously brought it up, and you know what? The artist appreciated it. She made a note and adjusted for next time. It wasn’t personal, it was practical.
Don’t Wait Too Long to Speak Up
That weird feeling in your gut? The “hmm… this doesn’t feel like me” moment? Don’t ignore it. Give feedback as early as possible, before final decisions are made or the wedding is too close to change anything.
Example:
Our engagement photos came back beautifully edited, but didn’t feel like us, too posed, not enough candids. We shared that with our photographer right away, and she offered a totally different direction for the wedding day. Had we said nothing, we might’ve ended up with photos we didn’t love forever.
Be Clear About What’s Working and What’s Not
You don’t have to rip something apart to make your point. Sandwich your feedback: lead with what you liked, share what didn’t land, and offer a suggestion.
Example:
“I love the vibe of the floral mock-up, and the texture is great. That said, I’m not loving the bright red. It’s a little bolder than we imagined. Could we try something more muted, like terracotta or dusty rose?”
You’re Not Being a Bridezilla (or Groomzilla)
Asking for edits, changes, or adjustments doesn’t make you difficult. It makes you invested. If your vendor makes you feel bad for giving feedback respectfully, that’s a red flag, not your fault.
Your vendors want to deliver something that feels right to you. Their best work happens when there’s clear communication, not blind approval.
Remember: It’s a Collaboration
Planning a wedding isn’t a solo act or a customer transaction, it’s a collaboration. Your planner, florist, band, or caterer brings the expertise. You bring the vision, the vibe, and the personal taste. When both of you contribute openly and honestly, magic happens.
Giving feedback doesn’t mean you don’t trust your vendors, it means you’re invested in the outcome. The most successful wedding days happen when everyone is on the same page, working toward the same vision.
So, yes, it might feel a little uncomfortable at first. But be kind, be direct, and remember: your voice matters in this process. You only get to do this once, so don’t walk away wishing you’d said something.
Your vendors want you to love the final result. Help them get there—with honesty, clarity, and mutual respect.